TC ~ "Mom, do you know what this do-es? (pointing at the breadmaker) You put anything in there and it turns it into bread."
Me ~ "Really?"
TC ~ "Yes, except-es cars and houses."
Tom ~ "I left my keys in my truck." (He drives a Honda mini-van.)
Me ~ "Do you call it a truck to make yourself feel better?"
Tom ~ "You have no idea. It's like putting on a dress every day."
(Before you feel too sorry for him, let me add that his work truck is a Ford F750 that eclipses everything else on the road.)