In The Gutter

I ran into a friend on Facebook recently that I hadn't talked to in the last few years. We exchanged all the usual pleasantries, and it was nice to reconnect with him. A bit later my phone rang, and it was him. He said that he felt he had to confess that even though he had said he was fine, he was not, and that he was just coming back to the rooms. After almost 13 years of sobriety, he had gotten injured and addicted to pain medication. He was just home from rehab. I love and respect this man, and it broke my heart to hear this. I hurt for him, but I'm so glad that he has found his way back, and is going to meetings daily. He said that his downfall was self pride, plain and simple. It's very easy to get confident in our own abilities, and think that we have this thing all wrapped up. The truth is that we never 'have it' and never will. 'It' has us, and when we start thinking otherwise, we are on very dangerous ground. The first step was admitting that we were powerless. We don't have that power, only God does, and until and unless we give up this fight to Him, we will never stay sober.

"Pride is the basic breeder of most human difficulties, the chief block to true progress.

Pride lures us into making demands upon ourselves or upon others which cannot be met without perverting or misusing our God-given instincts."

- As Bill Sees It, p. 12

I read this article today about a drunk found laying in a gutter, clutching a bottle. Know the difference between him and I? Nothing. There is nothing special about me that keeps me sober. I've done the work, sure, worked my steps and gone to meetings and talked to other alcoholics. But I am only able to do this by the grace of God, and without Him, I'd be laying in the gutter next to that man. But for the grace of God go I.